It is our belief that every person is worthy of love, dignity, and support.
At First Place Options, we are here to support you as the partner in a pregnancy. As the partner you may seek support for you and/or your pregnant partner in various ways.
Seeking out pregnancy options counselling for you and your partner is a good place to start with an unexpected pregnancy. You may want support for you and/or your partner during the pregnancy if a choice is made to continue the pregnancy. If the pregnancy ends in an abortion, then you and/or your partner may feel a need for after abortion support. At First Place Options, we seek to support you and your partner through this entire journey.
A pregnancy loss (miscarriage or stillbirth) can occur in an unwanted pregnancy or in a pregnancy that was planned. Regardless of the circumstances that resulted in a pregnancy, pregnancy loss can cause unexpected difficult thoughts and feelings. You may want support for you and/or your partner to process the pregnancy loss. First Place Options offers pregnancy loss support.
Facing an unplanned pregnancy can be an overwhelming experience for both you and your partner. You both may have many difficult emotions, thoughts and concerns. Take some time to get in touch with your feelings and thoughts so you can communicate with your partner in a way that will be helpful to both of you.
When working through the thoughts and emotions of an unplanned, unexpected pregnancy, there are many emotions that arise - for both of you. Pregnancy affects both partners. It’s important for men to take the time to understand their own thoughts and feelings about the pregnancy; however, men and women tend to adjust to an unplanned pregnancy in different ways and at different rates. These differences can cause conflict in your relationship.
While a pregnant woman must decide for herself how she will handle an unplanned pregnancy, in our experience of working with clients for years, the pregnant partner rarely wants to make that choice alone. There are practical ways that you can walk alongside your partner right now.
Giving your partner support, and sharing the responsibility in making the decisions at hand can make a world of difference. Encourage her to come to our support centre, where you can work through your thoughts and emotions; either together or separately. We have trained counsellors who can meet with you both, to discuss your options and explore your available supports.
Book an AppointmentIf your partner is unsure about how to proceed with the pregnancy, there are a few things that you can do to support her.
Facing an unplanned pregnancy can be very scary. Although your partner needs to make the final decision on whether to have an abortion, place for adoption or to parent, most women do not want to make this decision alone. Remind your partner that you are there with her no matter what.
Take time to listen to each other’s thoughts, concerns and fears, without interruption or judgement. You both need a space to process and be heard as you navigate this unexpected news. If you both have different thoughts and feelings about this pregnancy and how to move forward, allowing each other the space needed for processing can become more challenging. In these situations,
speaking with an unbiased third party can be really helpful. First Place Options counsellors can meet with you as a couple to help facilitate your conversations together, and or individually as you process.
It can be very challenging not to have the final say in the decision that is made. However, it is important not to pressure your partner in her final decision. Right now, she needs your support and to know that you are there for her no matter what decision she makes.
If your partner has decided to continue the pregnancy, either to parent or to place for adoption, there are some things that you can do to support her.
Pregnancy can be tiring, whether it’s during the first trimester and your partner is experiencing fatigue, nausea and food aversions or during the third trimester when sleep becomes more challenging and her body may be sore and uncomfortable from the growing baby. Practical support such as cooking meals and taking care of the household chores and errands can really help your partner during this time. Other practical ways that you can support your partner is by helping to get the nursery ready or researching what car seat or stroller you are going to get.
You can emotionally support your partner by offering to go to appointments and ultrasounds with her when possible. You can also inform yourself on pregnancy, birth and labour, so that you know what to expect. Knowing what to except can help you to be a source of comfort, support and encouragement for your partner along the way.
If your partner has had an abortion(s), she may experience relief and for her that may be the end of her post-abortion journey. Other women can struggle emotionally after an abortion.
If your partner is struggling emotionally after an abortion, it can be helpful to let her know that you are there for her and that you care. You may not understand how she is feeling or know what to say, but often your partner isn’t looking for answers from you. She just needs someone who will listen to her and provide some comfort. A listening ear and a hug can go a long way.
You can also provide practical support for your partner during this time. You can make dinner for her and take care of the household chores. Planning a fun activity and getting her out of the house, can temporarily help to get her mind off of her abortion experience.
If your partner is open to support, you can encourage her to reach out to First Place Options for our free After Abortion Support. Many of our clients who have had an abortion share that they don’t want to constantly burden their partner with how they are struggling after their abortion. Without their partner to talk to, feelings of being alone with their struggles can be very present and painful. First Place Options provides that safe place where she can process the thoughts and emotions that she is having surrounding her abortion(s).
After Abortion Partner SupportIf your partner had an abortion, either one or both of you can experience a wide range of thoughts and feelings as a result of the decision. It is not uncommon to feel grief, sadness, confusion, or perhaps something else that is difficult. At First Place Options, we want you to know that both you and your partner matter and you are not alone.
We understand that reaching out for support can be difficult. We provide a safe place for you to explore your thoughts and feelings in a confidential, non-judgemental, and supportive space. All Support is offered free of charge and is available virtually or in person.
Reach out to learn more about our After Abortion Support for partners of women who have had an abortion.
If you just discovered your girlfriend or partner is pregnant, you’re probably experiencing many emotions yourself. Men have little control over decisions regarding a pregnancy. This can be difficult to come to terms with.
You may be asking:
You may be thinking:
If you aren't sure where to start, start with being a good partner in this:
First Place Options
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Phone: 613-228-7475
Email: info@firstplaceoptions.ca
First Place Options
Smith Falls, Ontario, Canada
Phone: 613-228-7475
Email: info@firstplaceoptions.ca
We will reply to you within the next office day. If you do not receive a reply, please check your spam folder.
First Place Options offers free, non-judgemental, compassionate support.
We love People. Period.
Our pregnancy and counselling services are not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice and professional counselling or therapy. We are neither a medical provider, nor an abortion service provider.
